Here is to the end.

 He moved in. I've lost the war for your heart. It's clear to see this is what you meant by the things in motion.  This is what you wanted. I am truly in shock that this is what has happened. I thought it was you and me. Look down at your finger. It was supposed to be us. I feel a level of hurt and mistreatment that I can't put into words.  I gave so much of myself to you. I went into some of the deepest, darkest places into my heart and soul for you. I tried. I worked as hard as I could in the real world, I worked so hard, as hard as I could on my mental health. I went to therapy weekly to fix me. I tried to be better, for you, for our son, and for us as a family unit. I gave what I had. I know I wasn't perfect, but I kept trying. Over and over and over. But nothing I did was good enough. I still kept going. I fucking love you. My heart and soul are so broken.  I don't want to do this without you. I don't want to live. I would rather die than be without you. I can't fathom living another day and being without you. You lied to me. You lied about the bedbugs, you lied to me so many times. Because at the end of all of this, I'm not who you want. I'm never who you wanted. I can't fucking do this anymore. I can't do this. 

Maybe I'll just lay down for a while.