...alone

 its 10am on sunday morning. the house is quiet, the furnace just went off, so it's actually quiet.  but here i sit, existing... unsure of what to do. julian is still asleep and we are going to the waterpark today but i am melancholy, morose... just.. down. these are the moments i think i miss you most. those quiet moments, when i am awake and you are asleep and i can just come over to you and find you... dreaming,.. i used to watch you sleep a lot. i have always felt like your beauty was a reflection of who you are on the inside. i know it sounds so fucking cliche but i mean it. you are so incredibly kind to others. you're so giving of your time. i miss you. i miss your snoring. i miss holding you while you sleep. i miss having to wake you up multiple times. i miss you waking up to making you breakfasts that took me entirely too long to make. i miss you. i miss you. i miss you. i fucking miss you. i miss your good, i miss your bad. i miss being in your presence. i miss you.